My DEI journey is somewhat unique. I joined the Office of Governmental Affairs & Community Relations (GACR) at Brookdale Community College as the Confidential Associate in September 2021. I officially became a Women in Government Relations (WGR) member in December 2021. I didn’t have any “formal” training in issues of diversity, equity, and inclusion, but I quickly realized that it has been incorporated throughout my career in higher education. I joined the DEI Committee not long after becoming a WGR member because I wanted to continue to grow in my understanding of diversity, equity, inclusion, belonging, and accessibility issues. My goal was to incorporate what I learned into my work not only in higher education, but also government relations, advocacy, and policy.

Coincidentally, I am also an elected official – I was sworn into office as a Councilwoman for the Borough of Eatontown, located in Monmouth County, New Jersey. It is truly an honor and privilege to be of service to my community. Eatontown happens to be my hometown; I grew up here, went to public schools here, and my family still lives in the same house I was raised in. It’s a delicate dance I perform daily – I do my best to remain non-partisan/neutral in both my work as the Confidential Associate and as a Councilwoman. I also do my best not “co-mingle” both roles. I am aware that I am the only queer, Black woman in both spaces, and do not want to be seen as a “token”. I am in both spaces because of my talent and merit, not to cross off any figurative checkmarks to ensure there is diverse representation.

In my work as a Councilwoman, it is a responsibility of mine to ensure that I work with those who may not agree with my ideas, values, and beliefs. I am of the opinion that we all want the same thing, but we may have different ways on how we will reach that destination. So, where is the common ground?  I do my best to see where we agree, and not always highlight where we disagree. J.S. Knox, a 19th-century British author, said, “You cannot antagonize and influence at the same time." It’s hard for me to build consensus when I am attacking a person, their character, their ideology, etc.  That was highlighted to me at a recent Council meeting.

Of course, I work on issues that may not be as popular – or of importance – to my fellow Council members. However, I am still an opinionated person. I just choose when I pick my battles, in part because of how I self-identify and how others perceive me. Nevertheless, the recent shootings at Buffalo (NY), Laguna Woods (CA), and Uvalde (TX) left me rattled and feeling unsettled and helpless. As Fannie Lou Hamer eloquently said in a 1964 speech, “I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.” I barely started to process the white supremacy that fueled the Buffalo shooting when I learned about the shooting that took place in a church congregation that seemed to target Asian Americans. Now, I have to process and grieve the children and teachers who were killed in Uvalde. When will Americans realize that we have a public health epidemic of gun violence? Is it safe for underrepresented communities to go to public places, including grocery stores, places of worship, and schools? In a span of two weeks, there were three mass shootings that shook me to the core. I couldn’t help myself from speaking during public comments, and I no longer cared if people heard my frustration and emotion. Something needs to be done, and it needs to be done immediately. At the end of the meeting, a Councilman who happens to be a retired Army colonel said to me, “I don’t want you to take my guns away.” We then had a conversation where I explained to him that my goal wasn’t to take away his guns – I support the 2nd Amendment, but I asked him rhetorically why we as a country cannot agree on a sound gun policy that includes background checks, etc.? In 1999, I was a high school student when Columbine happened, and if no policy changes were made after Sandy Hook and/or Parkland, then I was discouraged to believe that anything would be done at the federal level after these recent shootings. I don’t know if he agreed with me – and my goal of the conversation was not to win him over – but I wanted him to at least hear my perspective. In that, I was successful. I felt seen and heard. Someone can (and has the right) to disagree with me, but you will not demean and disrespect me.

That conversation made me think more about allyship and advocacy regarding the work I do in both higher education and local government. As defined by Pollack & Travis (2021), an ally is someone who “actively supports people from marginalized groups,” and an advocate is someone who “takes action in service of a cause, and the people it affects, to influence decision-makers and decision-making.” Both are important, and I view them as separate, yet important tools – allyship is “micro” and advocacy is “macro.” I see myself as an ally because I have those genuine relationships with people, and I witness how they do not receive the support and/or resources they need. I also see myself as an advocate because I will use my privilege, my networks, and my resources to speak up for underserved communities and help create the change in legislation and policy to help them access the information, resources, and assistance needed to be successful. It influences the work that I do as a higher education professional and especially as an elected official. Being an advocate and ally reminds me of Proverbs 31:8-9 (NLT), which says, “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed. Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice.” It is important for me to develop authentic relationships, work with compassion, and use my position of influence to advocate for others who are not in the room where decisions are made, impacting their daily lives. This is one of my daily reminders that I was equipped and prepared to be in this role and to use my influence with wisdom and equity. My hope is that I influence others to use their voice to be an ally and advocate in their own unique way, to create positive change in their communities.

This blog is part of a blog series featuring authentic voices that highlight the three key learning areas— Ownership, Allyship and Action—of this year's DEI Summit.

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Pollack, A., & Travis, D.J. (2021, October 14). Allyship and advocacy at work: 5 key questions answered. Catalyst. https://www.catalyst.org/2021/10/14/allyship-advocacy-questions-answered/#:~:text=Allyship%20means%20you're%20doing,%2Dmakers%20and%20decision%2Dmaking.